Letter 377

What a misfortune about Alexio! It has upset me more than you can believe, and not, I assure you, particularly on the score which most people seem to think it has, asking to what doctor I shall turn now. What do I want with a doctor now? And, if I do want one, is there such a dearth of them? It is his love for me, his kindness and charming manner that I miss. There is another thing, too. What have we not to fear, when so temperate a person and so skilful a physician can be overcome suddenly by such a disease? But for all these things there is one consolation: we are born under this condition, that we may not refuse anything that fate has in store for mortals. As for Antony, I have told you before that I have not met him. For he came to Misenum when I was at Pompeii, and he left before I knew he was there. But by chance, when I was reading your letter, Hirtius was with me at Puteoli. I read it to him and pleaded with him. At first he would not make any concession worth counting, but in the end he said I should direct not only this matter but all his consulship. With Antony I shall put the matter so that he may see that, if he obliges me in this particular nobis satis fecerit, totum me futurum suum. Dolabellam spero domi esse. Redeamus ad nostros. De quibus tu bonam spem te significas habere propter edictorum humanitatem. Ego autem perspexi, cum a me XVII Kal. de Puteolano Neapolim Pansae conveniendi causa proficisceretur Hirtius, omnem eius sensum. Seduxi enim et ad pacem sum cohortatus. Non poterat scilicet negare se velle pacem, sed non minus se nostrorum arma timere quam Antoni, et tamen utrosque non sine causa praesidium habere, se autem utraque arma metuere. Quid quaeris? οὐδὲν ὑγιές. De Quinto filio tibi adsentior. Patri quidem certe gratissimae bellae tuae litterae fuerunt. Caerelliae vero facile satis feci; nec valde laborare mihi visa est, et, si illa, ego certe non laborarem. Istam vero, quam tibi molestam scribis esse, auditam a te esse omnino demiror. Nam, quod eam conlaudavi apud amicos audientibus tribus filiis eius et filia tua, τί ἐκ τούτου; Parumne foeda persona est ipsius senectutis? Quod Brutus rogat, ut ante Kalendas, ad me quoque scripsit, et fortasse faciam. Sed plane, quid velit, nescio. Quid enim illi adferre consilii possum, cum ipse egeam consilio, et cum ille suae inmortalitati melius quam nostro otio consuluerit? De regina rumor exstinguitur. De Flamma, obsecro te, si quid potes. matter, I shall be entirely his for the future. I hope Dolabella is at home. Let us return to our heroes. You hint that you have good hopes for them in the moderate tone of the edicts. But, when Hirtius left me at Puteoli on the 16th of May to meet Pansa at Naples, his whole mind was revealed to me. For I took him aside and exhorted him to keep the peace. He could not, of course, say that he did not want peace, but he did say that he was as much afraid of armed action on our side as from Antony, and that after all both had reason for being on their guard, and for his part he was afraid of hostilities from both. In fact he is quite unreliable. About young Quintus I agree with you. His father, at any rate, was most pleased with your nice letter. Caerellia I easily satisfied; she did not seem to me to bother herself much, and, if she had, I certainly should not have done so. As to the lady who you say is plaguing you, I wonder you listened to her at all. For, if I did compliment her before friends, when three of her own sons and your daughter were present, what is there in that? "Why should I wear a mask before men's eyes?" Is not old age itself a mask ugly enough? You say Brutus asks me to come before the 1st. He has written to me too, and perhaps I shall do so. But I really don't know what he wants. What advice can I give him, when I want advice myself, and when he has thought of his immortality rather than our peace of mind? The rumour about Cleopatra is dying out. As to Flamma, pray do what you can. Yesterday I sent off a letter to you as I was leaving Puteoli and stopped at my house at Cumae. There I found Pilia enjoying the best of health. Indeed, I saw her again shortly afterwards at Cumae. For she had come for a funeral, which I also was attending. Our friend Cn. Lucullus was burying his mother. So I stayed that day at Sinuessa, and there I have scribbled this as I am starting early in the morning of the next day for Arpinum. However, I have no news either to write to you or to ask from you, unless you think this is to the point. Brutus has sent me the speech he delivered in the meeting on the Capitol, and has asked me to correct it without regarding his feelings, before he publishes it. Now the speech is most elegantly expressed as regards its sentiments, and its language could not be surpassed. But myself, if I had pleaded that cause, I should have written with more fire. You realize what the theme is and what the speaker is. So I could not alter it. For considering the style our friend Brutus affects and the opinion he holds of the best style of oratory, he has attained it in its highest elegance in this speech. But rightly or wrongly I have aimed at something different. However, I should like you to read the speech, if you have not done so already, and to let me know your opinion, though I am afraid that your name will lead you astray and you will be hyper-Attic in your criticism. However, if you will recall Demosthenes' thunder-bursts, you will be able to realize that one can use considerable force even in posse vel ἀττικώτατα gravissime dici. Sed haec coram. Nunc nec sine epistula nec cum inani epistula volui ad te Metrodorum venire.

O factum male de Alexione! incredibile est quanta me molestia adfecerit, nec me hercule ex ea parte maxime quod plerique mecum, 'ad quem igitur te medicum conferes?' quid mihi iam medico? aut si opus est, tanta inopia est? amorem erga me, humanitatem suavitatemque desidero. etiam illud. quid est quod non pertimescendum sit cum hominem temperantem, summum medicum tantus improviso morbus oppresserit? sed ad haec omnia una consolatio est quod ea condicione nati sumus ut nihil quod homini accidere possit recusare debeamus. [2] de Antonio iam antea tibi scripsi non esse eum a me conventum. venit enim Misenum cum ego essem in Pompeiano. Inde ante profectus est quam ego eum venisse cognovi. sed casu, cum legerem tuas litteras, Hirtius erat apud me in Puteolano. ei legi et egi. primum quod attinet, nihil mihi concedebat, deinde ad summam arbitrum me statuebat non modo huius rei sed totius consulatus sui. Cum Antonio autem sic agemus ut perspiciat, si in eo negotio nobis satis fecerit, totum me futurum suum. Dolabellam spero domi esse. [3] redeamus ad nostros. de quibus tu bonam spem te significas habere propter edictorum humanitatem. ego autem perspexi, cum a me xvii Kal. de Puteolano Neapolim Pansae conveniendi causa proficisceretur Hirtius, omnem eius sensum. seduxi enim et ad pacem sum cohortatus. non poterat scilicet negare se velle pacem, sed non minus se nostrorum arma timere quam Antoni, et tamen utrosque non sine causa praesidium habere, se autem utraque arma metuere. quid quaeris? ou)de\n u(gie/j. [4] de Quinto filio tibi adsentior. patri quidem certe gratissimae bellae tuae litterae fuerunt. Caerelliae vero facile satis feci; nec valde laborare mihi visa est, et si illa, ego certe non laborarem. istam vero quam tibi molestam scribis esse auditam a te esse omnino demiror. nam quod eam conlaudavi apud amicos audientibus tribus filiis eius et filia tua, to\ e)k tou/tou quid est hoc? quid est au/tem cur ego pe/rsonatus a/mbulem? parumne foeda persona est ipsius senectutis? quod Brutus rogat ut ante Kalendas, ad me quoque scripsit et fortasse faciam. sed plane quid velit nescio. quid enim illi adferre consili possum, cum ipse egeam consilio et cum ille suae immortalitati melius quam nostro otio consuluerit? de regina rumor exstinguitur. de Flamma, obsecro te, si quid potes.