Letter 1015: To his own lord and special patron in Christ the Lord, Bishop Aeonius — Ruricius.

15. To his own particular lord in Christ, his lord and patron, Bishop Aeonius, from Ruricius. Having learned of the passing of my lord your predecessor Leontius, whose memory is holy and venerable in my regard, I was confounded in heart and mind, and for a long time and greatly I grieved, because, through the hindrance of my sins, I had not deserved to come into the presence of so great a prelate, and because I was bereaved of such a father. For although I did not enjoy the sight of his outward man, yet I delighted in the grace of his inward man and clung to him unceasingly with the keenness of my mind; through him and in him he was in a certain sense made present to me, and was beheld by my gaze, and was heard by his address, and was touched by my touch, and was held in my embrace, since loved ones behold themselves in no better place than in the heart, in the very seat of his love. For this reason I desired all the more to see with bodily eyes the one whom I thus gazed upon with spiritual eyes. But his own merits granted to my grief the consolation that those very things had earlier afforded me as a comfort, because I am confident that he who was loved by his fatherly devotion will also be guarded by his attentive intercession. But these things I had reported to your holiness as though conversing with you, and, with love dictating, seeking from you the relief of that very sorrow. Now, however, as I had set out to say, having learned of the summoning of my lord himself and of the ordination of your apostolate, I was thinking of sending to your office. But by your gifts you have anticipated the dutiful service of my humility, gifts which have conferred upon me greater confidence in writing, because I presume that the one whom you have made worthy by your generosity you do not hold estranged from your affections. And therefore, just as you give me to understand, since you deign to hold me of such account, by my letter I declare abundant well-being to your beatitude, and at the same time with a particular prayer I beseech that you deign to deal with me with such great affection, that I may know that my lord Leontius has rather been sent ahead and exchanged than lost.

XV. DOMINO SUO PECULIARI IN CHRISTO DOMINO PATRONO AEONIO EPISCOPO RURICIUS. Agnito transitu sanctae ac uenerabilis apud me recordationis domini mei decessoris uestri Leontii animo et mente confusus diu multumque tristatus sum, quod et inpedientibus peccatis meis tanto antestiti occurrere non merueram et tali essem parente priuatus. cuius etsi exterioris hominis non fruebar aspectu, interioris tamen gratia delectabar et mentis acie iugiter adhaerebam, per quem et in quo mihi praesens quodammodo et cernebatur obtutu et audiebatur affatu et palpabatur adtactu 6 distinaui S mansuetudine-impositum Ruricius infra 1135 repetit 7 fartura coni. v 9 tarditate om. S, cf. Rur. II 35 sedentes S 11 pariter om. v 12 ouortuit S 13 pollicitacione S deposcemus S 15 uestra scripsi, nostra S, om. v dignimini S 16 populi S 18 eonio S 20 sancto v et v uenerabiles S recordacionis S 21 leonti S 24 exteroris S 26 adherebam S 27 affatu LuetjQhann, affectu S et tenebatur amplexu, siquidem cari nullo se melius loco quam in corde caritatis ipsius sede conspiciunt. unde et amplius desiderabam oculis uidere carnalibus, quem ita spiritalibus intuebar. sed dolori meo consolationem ea, quae prius tribuerant solacium, ipsius merita dederunt, quia confido, quod, quem paterna pietas dilexit, et sedula intercessione custodiat. Sed haec sanctitati uestrae quasi uobiscum colloquens atque a uobis maeroris ipsius leuamen requirens dictante dilectione retuleram. nunc uero, ut dicere institueram, accersione ipsius domini mei et apostolatus uestri ordinatione conperta ad officium uestrum mittere cogitabam. sed muneribus uestris humilitatis meae praeuenistis obsequium, quae mihi maiorem scribendi fiduciam contulerunt, quia praesumo, quod, quem liberalitate feceritis dignum, ab animis uestris non habeatis alienum. et ideo, sicut datis intellegi, quoniam tanti habere dignamini, sospitationem beatitudini uestrae per litteras uberem dico simulque peculiari prece deposco eo mecum agere tanti habeatis affectu, ut domnum Leontium praemisisse et commutasse potius quam perdidisse cognoscam.