Letter 454: Theodore Studite, Letter 454; Greek heading: Τῇ ὁμόζυγι Δημόχαρι.

From the day on which the death of the blessed general was announced to us until now, though we have made many attempts, we have not been granted the opportunity to write to Your Honor; and even now, in writing, we are unable to be of any benefit to you or to lighten any of the burden of your grieving heart (for what words could be found capable of healing so great a pain?), but we write so that we may make ourselves plainly known to you, that we too have shared in your sorrow—not only over him who has gone home to the Lord, since a good and pious man, a champion of orthodoxy and a contender for peace, has departed from us (oh, the calamity!), but also over you, who have been left bereft of your wedded helpmate, and the more so as you loved your husband exceedingly. In this way, then, the account of it has shown the suffering to be beyond consolation. Yet since you are not untaught in the divine decree, that you are earth and to earth you shall return [Genesis 3:19], and again, that you should not grieve over those who have fallen asleep as do the rest who have no hope, since they will be brought together with Jesus by God at the resurrection [1 Thessalonians 4:13-14], we exhort and implore you to empty out the greater part of your grief, to take a little consolation, to come to yourself, to make your soul cheerful—since you also have children, and a great household stands in your care, which, unless your mind should rise above the mastery of grief, could never be rightly managed and governed. And above all, what is said will be of profit to that blessed man as well; than which what could be more worth striving for? What then remains, my lady? Give glory to the good God, utter the words of Job: the Lord gave, the Lord has taken away; as it seemed good to the Lord, so also has it come to pass [Job 1:21]. May there be from this, in truth, the very greatest glory, and may you show forth what kind of well-instructed man you became the wedded partner of; for he indeed was both discerning and wise and a teacher of the uninitiated. As, therefore, he was a noble example to men, be you also one to women, turning aside from love of mourning and showing that God is your protector—he who brought you from non-being into being, and led you to the prime of your age, and joined you to so great a man, and who, having now parted you, will reunite you through the resurrection. So consider the matter to be a journey abroad. Would you not have borne the deprivation, had an earthly emperor commanded it? Then bear this one too, my mistress, which He who alone is true and is King of all has ordained. Yes, we exhort you, and indeed we believe that you will receive him back on that day, if you keep your widowhood in the Lord and rear most excellently your fair offspring—whom we also greet, and in like manner we urge you to bear the loss of their father and to be shaped, by a mother's discipline, toward all uprightness.

Ἀφ' ἧς ἡμέρας ἀνηγγέλη ἡμῖν ὁ θάνατος τοῦ μακαρίου στρατηγοῦ μέχρι τοῦ δεῦρο, πολλὰ δοκιμάσαντες, οὐκ εὐωδώθημεν ἐπιστεῖλαι τῇ τιμιότητί σου· καὶ νῦν δὲ ἐπιστέλλοντες οὐδέν σε ὠφελεῖν οὐδὲ ἐλαφροποιεῖν τοῦ βάρους τῆς ἐνωδύνου καρδίας δυνάμεθα (τίς γὰρ καὶ ἐξευρεθείη λόγος ἄλγος τοσοῦτον θεραπεύειν;), ἀλλ' ἵνα καταδήλους ἑαυτοὺς ποιήσωμεν ὡς μετέσχομεν καὶ αὐτοὶ λύπης οὐ μόνον ἐπὶ τῷ ἐνδημήσαντι πρὸς Κύριον, ὅτι ἀνὴρ ἀγαθὸς καὶ εὐσεβής, πρόμαχος ὀρθοδοξίας καὶ ἀγωνιστὴς εἰρήνης ἀπολέλοιπεν ἡμᾶς (ὢ τῆς συμφορᾶς), ἀλλὰ καὶ ἐπὶ σοὶ τῇ καταλειφθείσῃ ἐρήμῳ τῆς ὁμοζυγικῆς ἐπικουρίας, ἄλλως τε καὶ φιλανδρούσῃ λίαν. Οὕτως οὖν ἀπαραμύθητον τὸ πάθος ἀπέδειξεν ὁ λόγος. ἀλλ' ἐπεὶ οὐκ εἶ ἀδίδακτος τοῦ θείου διατάγματος ὅτι γῆ εἶ καὶ εἰς γῆν ἀπελεύσῃ, καὶ πάλιν, ἵνα μὴ ἐπὶ τοῖς κεκοιμημένοις λυπῆσθε, καθὼς καὶ οἱ λοιποὶ οἱ μὴ ἔχοντες ἐλπίδα, ὡς ἀχθησομένοις σὺν τῷ Ἰησοῦ ὑπὸ θεοῦ ἐν τῇ ἀναστάσει, παρακαλοῦμεν καὶ ἀντιβολοῦμεν κενῶσαί σε τὸ πολὺ τῆς λύπης, λαβεῖν παραμύθιον μικρόν, εἰς ἑαυτὴν γενέσθαι, ἱλαρῦναι τὴν ψυχήν, ἐπειδὴ καὶ τέκνα ἔχεις καὶ οἰκία σοι πάρεστιν μεγαλοφυὴς καί, εἰ μὴ ὁ νοῦς ἀνενέγκοι τῆς κατακρατήσεως τοῦ πάθους, διοικεῖν καὶ διέπειν ὀρθῶς οὐκ ἄν ποτε δυνηθείη. ἐπὶ πᾶσι δὲ κἀκείνῳ τῷ μακαρίῳ λυσιτελήσει τὸ λεγόμενον· οὗ τί ἂν γένοιτο περισπουδαστότερον; Τί οὖν λοιπόν, ὦ κυρία; δὸς δόξαν τῷ ἀγαθῷ θεῷ, φθέγξαι τὰ τοῦ Ἰώβ, ὁ Κύριος ἔδωκεν, ὁ Κύριος ἀφείλατο, ὡς τῷ Κυρίῳ ἔδοξεν, οὕτως καὶ ἐγένετο. εἴη ἐντεῦθεν ὡς ἀληθῶς μέγιστον κλέος καὶ φανείης οἵου πεπαιδευμένου ἀνδρὸς ὁμόζυγος ἐγένου· καὶ γὰρ ἐκεῖνος καὶ γνωστικὸς καὶ σοφὸς καὶ παιδευτὴς τῶν ἀμυήτων. ὡς οὖν ἐκεῖνος ἀνδράσιν ὑπόδειγμα καλόν, ἔσο καὶ αὐτὴ γυναιξίν, ἐκκλίνουσα τὸ φιλοπενθὲς καὶ δεικνύουσα ὅτι σοι προστάτης ὁ θεός, ὃς καὶ ἐκ τοῦ μὴ ὄντος εἰς τὸ εἶναί σε παρήγαγεν καὶ εἰς ἀκμὴν ἡλικίας ἤγαγε καὶ τηλικούτῳ ἀνδρὶ συνέζευξεν, καὶ αὖθις διαζεύξας ἑνώσειεν διὰ τῆς ἀναστάσεως. ὥστε νόμισον ἀποδημίαν εἶναι τὸ πρᾶγμα· οὐκ ἆρα ἤνεγκες τὴν στέρησιν, εἰ βασιλεὺς ἐπίγειος ἐπέτρεψεν; οἶσον, δέσποινά μου, καὶ τήνδε, ἣν ὁ μόνος ἀληθινὸς καὶ πάντων βασιλεὺς ἐκέλευσεν. ναί, παρακαλοῦμεν, καί γε πιστεύομεν ἀπολήψεσθαί σε αὐτὸν ἐν τῇ ἡμέρᾳ ἐκείνῃ, φυλάττουσαν τὴν χηρείαν ἐν Κυρίῳ καὶ τεκνοτροφοῦσαν ἄριστα τὰ καλὰ βλαστήματα· ἅπερ καὶ προσαγορεύομεν καὶ ὁμοιοτρόπως σοι παραινοῦμεν φέρειν τὴν πατρικὴν στέρησιν καὶ μητρικῇ διαπλάττεσθαι ῥυθμίσει πρὸς πᾶσαν εὐθύτητα.