Letter 14: Cicero writes to Quintus in the country from Rome in February 54 BC.

Marcus to his brother Quintus, greetings. 1. I am glad that my letters give you pleasure; and yet even now I would have had nothing to write about, had I not received yours. For on the day before the Ides, when Appius had convened a thinly-attended Senate, the cold was so severe that he was forced by the people's outcry to dismiss us. As for the Commagenian [Antiochus I of Commagene], because I had demolished the whole proposal, Appius pays me wonderful court, both on his own account and through Pomponius [Atticus]; for he sees that, if I employ this style of speaking in the other matters, February will prove barren for him. And I made sport of the man wittily enough, and not only wrenched away from him that little town which was situated at Zeugma on the Euphrates, but I also raised great laughter among the company by jeering at his purple-bordered toga [the toga praetexta, a mark of honor], which he had obtained when Caesar was consul. 3. "As for his wishing," I said, "that the same honors be renewed, so that he need not patch up his purple-bordered toga every year, I judge that nothing need be decreed; but you, men of noble birth, who would not tolerate the Bostran [the prince of Bostra] in a bordered toga, will you tolerate the Commagenian in one?" You see the kind of joking, and the occasion for it. I said much against the obscure king, by which he was utterly hissed off the stage; and Appius, stirred by this manner of mine, as I said, embraces me wholly; for nothing is easier than to demolish the remaining proposals. But I shall not do so, lest I offend him, lest he invoke the protection of Jupiter the God of Hospitality and summon together all his Greeks, through whom he was reconciled with me. 4. We shall give satisfaction to Theopompus. As for Caesar, it had slipped my mind to write to you, for I see what sort of letter you have been expecting; but he wrote to Balbus that the little packet of letters, in which both mine and Balbus's had been included, had been delivered to him entirely soaked with water, so that he did not even know that there had been any letter of mine. But from Balbus's letter he had made out a few words, to which he replied in these terms: "I see that you have written something about Cicero, which I have not understood; but as far as I could grasp by conjecture, it was of such a kind that I judged it more to be wished for than hoped for." 5. And so afterwards I sent to Caesar a letter to that same effect. As for his joke about his own poverty, do not despise it: to him I wrote back that there was nothing on account of which he need henceforth throw his accounts into confusion out of reliance on our strongbox; and I made sport in that vein both intimately and with dignity. His affection toward us, indeed, is reported by everyone's messages to be exceptional; the letter, at any rate, on the point you are expecting will be joined more or less with your return. We shall write to you of the remaining matters day by day, provided only that you furnish letter-carriers; although such cold was threatening that there was the very gravest danger that Appius's own house might be burned down [a play on his "chilly" reception in the Senate].

I am glad you like my letter: however, I should not even now have had anything to write about, if I had not received yours. For on the 12th, when Appius had got together a thinly-attended meeting of the senate, the cold was so great that he was compelled by the general clamour to dismiss us. As to the Commagenian, because I have blown that proposition to the winds, Appius makes wonderful advances to me both personally and through Pomponius; for he sees that if I adopt a similar style of discussion in the other business, February will not bring him anything in. And certainly I did chaff him pretty well, and not only wrenched from his grasp that petty township of his--situated in the territory of Zeugma on the Euphrates—but also raised a loud laugh by my satire on the man's purple-edged toga, which he had been granted when Caesar was consul. "His wish," said I, "for a renewal of the same honour, to save the yearly re-dying of his purple-edged toga, I do not think calls for any decree of the house; but you, my lords, who could not endure that the Bostrian should wear the toga praetexta, will you allow the Commagenian to do so?" You see the style of chaff, and the line I took. I spoke at length against the petty princeling, with the result that he was utterly laughed out of court. Alarmed by this exhibition, as I said, Appius is making up to me For nothing could be easier than to explode the rest of his proposals. But I will not go so far as to trip him up, lest he appeal to the god of hospitality, and summon all his Greeks—it is they who make us friends again. I will do what Theopompus wants. I had forgotten to write to you about Caesar: for I perceive what sort of letter you have been expecting. But the fact is, he has written word to Balbus that the little packet of letters, in which mine and Balbus's were packed, had been so drenched with rain that he was not even aware that there was a letter from me. He had, however, made out a few words of Balbus's letter, to which he answered as follows: "I perceive that you have written something about Cicero, which I have not fully made out: but, as far I could guess, it was of a kind that I thought was more to be wished than hoped for." Accordingly, I afterwards sent Caesar a duplicate copy of the letter. Don't be put off by that passage about his want of means. In answer to it I wrote back saying that he must not stop payment from any reliance on my money chest, and descanted playfully on that subject, in familiar terms and yet without derogating from my dignity. His good feeling towards us, however, according to all accounts, is marked. The letter, indeed, on the point of which you expect to hear, will almost coincide with your return: the other business of each day I will write on condition of your furnishing me with letter-carriers. However, such cold weather is threatening, that there is very great danger that Appius may find his house frost-bitten and deserted!

X. Scr. Romae Idibus Februariis a.u.c. 700. MARCUS QUINTO FRATRI SALUTEM. 1. Gaudeo tibi iucundas esse meas litteras, nec tamen habuissem scribendi nunc quidem ullum argumentem, nisi tuas accepissem; nam pridie Idus, cum Appius senatum infrequentem coegisset, tantum fuit frigus, ut populi convicio coactus sit nos dimittere. De Commageno, quod rem totam discusseram, mirifice mihi et per se et per Pomponium blanditur Appius; videt enim, hoc genere dicendi si utar in ceteris, Februarium sterilem futurum. Eumque lusi iocoso satis, neque solum illud extorsi oppidulum, quod erat positum in Euphrati Zeugmate, sed praeterea togam sum eius praetextam, quam erat adeptus Caesare consule, magno hominum risu cavillatus. 3. "Quod vult," inquam, "renovari honores eosdem, quo minus togam praetextam quotannis interpolet, decernendum nihil censeo; vos autem, homines nobiles, qui Bostrenum praetextatum non ferebatis, Commagenum feretis?" Genus vides et locum iocandi. Multa dixi in ignobilem regem, quibus totus est explosus; quo genere commotus, ut dixi, Appius totum me amplexatur; nihil est enim facilius quam reliqua discutere; sed non faciam, ut illum offendam, ne imploret fidem Iovis Hospitalis, Graios omnes convocet, per quos mecum in gratiam rediit. 4. Theopompo satisfaciemus. De Caesare fugerat me ad te scribere, video enim, quas tu litteras exspectaris; sed ille scripsit ad Balbum fasciculum illum epistularum, in quo fuerat et mea et Balbi, totum sibi aqua madidum redditum esse, ut ne illud quidem sciat, meam fuisse aliquam epistulam. Sed ex Balbi epistula pauca verba intellexerat, ad quae rescripsit his verbis: "de Cicerone te video quiddam scripsisse, quod ego non intellexi; quantum autem coniectura consequebar, id erat eiusmodi, ut magis optandum quam sperandum putarem." 5. Itaque postea misi ad Caesarem eodem illo exemplo litteras. Iocum autem illius de sua egestate ne sis aspernatus: ad quem ego rescripsi nihil esse, quod posthac arcae nostrae fiducia conturbaret, lusique in eo genere et familiariter et cum dignitate. Amor autem eius erga nos perfertur omnium nuntiis singularis; litterae quidem ad id, quod exspectas, fere cum tuo reditu iungentur. Reliqua singulorum dierum scribemus ad te, si modo tabellarios tu praebebis: quamquam eiusmodi frigus impendebat, ut summum periculum esset, ne Appio suae aedes urerentur.