Letter 9012: A friend of mine was thrashing his son for spending money too lavishly in buying horses and dogs.

To Junior. A friend of mine was thrashing his son for spending money too lavishly in buying horses and dogs. When the youth had gone, I said to the father : "Come now, did you never commit a fault, for which your father might have reproved you? Why, of course you have. Do you not now and then still commit actions for which your son would equally severely reprimand you, if your positions were suddenly changed, and he became the father and you the son? Are not all men liable to make mistakes? Does not one man indulge himself in one way and another in another?" I was so struck with this man's undue severity that I have written and told you about it, out of the affection we bear one another, so that you may never act with undue bitterness and harshness towards your son. Remember that he is a boy and that you have been a boy yourself, and in exercising your parental authority do not forget that you are a man and the father of a man. Farewell.

L To Junior. A friend of mine was thrashing his son for spending money too lavishly in buying horses and dogs. When the youth had gone, I said to the father : "Come now, did you never commit a fault, for which your father might have reproved you? Why, of course you have. Do you not now and then still commit actions for which your son would equally severely reprimand you, if your positions were suddenly changed, and he became the father and you the son? Are not all men liable to make mistakes? Does not one man indulge himself in one way and another in another?" I was so struck with this man's undue severity that I have written and told you about it, out of the affection we bear one another, so that you may never act with undue bitterness and harshness towards your son. Remember that he is a boy and that you have been a boy yourself, and in exercising your parental authority do not forget that you are a man and the father of a man. Farewell.

C. PLINIUS IUNIORI SUO S. Castigabat quidam filium suum quod paulo sumptuosius equos et canes emeret. Huic ego iuvene digresso: 'Heus tu, numquamne fecisti, quod a patre corripi posset? "Fecisti" dico. Non interdum facis quod filius tuus, si repente pater ille tu filius, pari gravitate reprehendat? Non omnes homines aliquo errore ducuntur? Non hic in illo sibi, in hoc alius indulget?' Haec tibi admonitus immodicae severitatis exemplo, pro amore mutuo scripsi, ne quando tu quoque filium tuum acerbius duriusque tractares. Cogita et illum puerum esse et te fuisse, atque ita hoc quod es pater utere, ut memineris et hominem esse te et hominis patrem. Vale.