Letter 11: Theodore Studite, Letter 11; Greek heading: Ἀναστασίῳ ἐπισκόπῳ Κνωσίασ.

What has come over you, most holy father, and why, even after a first and a second refusal, do you still press me so hard, so as to receive a word of spiritual profit from me, an unlearned and passion-ridden man? I myself have rather the need to be enlightened by you, I who am both second in rank and darkened in my way of life - and I do not mean as regards what is owed in the office of a bishop's oversight [episkope] (alas for my incapacity!), but as regards the monastic, or rather the abbatial, condition: namely, how, having governed according to reason the flock entrusted to me unworthily, I might find God merciful on the day of my dread reckoning. But you have surely come to this out of the utmost humility; for it is not lawful for me to suspect that your high priesthood [archierosyne, the episcopal dignity] is making trial of my want of instruction. I, then, am in dread over the things of my own degree, O sacred head, and I am truly dizzy concerning the guidance of souls - how, that is, I am to bring safely out of the much-tossed and ever-billowing sea of the mind this tiny and rational little vessel committed to me, into the harbor of salvation; since for this there is need both of a life of pure conduct and of the attainment of sufficient knowledge, so that, steering as if by two oars, I may watchfully and skillfully keep both myself and those who follow me unsubmerged by the waters of sin. This, then, is my defense, the defense of a wretched man. But since it is not altogether without danger to leave the command of Your Holiness disobeyed, even though it is beyond my strength - and especially since I have received the injunction from my own father [Theodore's spiritual father, i.e. his superior] as well - trusting in the obedience due to both of you, I utter this to you, O most divine father, in the manner of a reminder: that the ship of your perfection is by far greater and more surpassing than my little boat (I mean the episcopal eminence as against the abbatial rank), and so much so as you have been deemed worthy to rule over more people, and these perhaps not willing, nor of one mind, nor of the same nature and rank, but men and women, monks and laity living together, rulers and ruled, the married and the unmarried, slaves and free, orphans and widows, rich and poor, the powerful and the oppressed, debtors and creditors, those who live in luxury and those who are starving to death, the many-propertied and the destitute, those clothed in soft garments and those clad in rags. For these things, and more than these, do not appear in our [monastic] way of life, whereas yours is filled with them. And neither is your whole people governed by a single concern, nor do you know the faces and names of all, nor do you discern each one's manner of life; rather, different people differ from one another in many ways: for some, perhaps, till the soil, others sail the sea, others tend flocks, others are idle, others act as agents and collectors, and great is the account of the work seen in each one. And upon all these, how great and how vast is the labor - as I, who am without reckoning, reckon it - how great the sweat, the struggle, the running, the strenuousness, the anxiety, the care, the wasting of the flesh, the pain of the soul, the exhaustion of the mind! Just as, then, the man who steers the ship in a great storm and tempest of the sea is wholly sober and unshaken, keeping a sleepless eye (for it carries no small danger that inexperience and carelessness should creep in even a little), so much the more must the pilot of souls know the work of his presidency more contendingly and more exactly, lest he sink beneath the deep of perdition. For this reason, as I think, most holy one, the great Apostle [Paul] cried out: 'Who is weak, and I am not weak? Who is made to stumble, and I am not inflamed?' And again: 'I became to the Jews as a Jew, to those under the law as under the law, to those without the law as without the law - not being without the law, but lawfully bound to Christ. I became all things to all, that I might gain all.' Behold, thus also the canons that accord with him, and the definitions of the episcopal office, declare the very same things as our own God-inspired fathers themselves. Therefore, having read and understood the writings of the saints, and having in your hands the words handed down from God, why do you seek such a thing from me, a wretch? I take the bishop to be the overseer and the one accountable for all the conduct of those under him, an angel that does not keep silence, proclaiming the ordinances of God; an unsleeping eye, watching over the ways of each one of those led out by him; an imitation of Christ, looking to whom those who follow may shape their own life in evangelical fashion; an ever-shining luminary, made known to those who fight in the night [waging nighttime battle] out of ignorance and sin; one who rains down the word of teaching upon those who thirst for the things of salvation; a greatest steward [oikonomos], one whose account of each person's life is to be audited at the time of recompense. There is, therefore, nothing greater than this nearness to God and love, nor anything better rewarded than so great a superintendence (as Christ himself says to the chief Apostle, 'If you love me, Peter, more than these, feed my sheep'), nor anything more perilous and more destructive to those who embrace it unworthily. But I myself know well, best of fathers, that you, as a good shepherd, have ever laid down your soul for your sheep, facing danger first on behalf of each single one, not terrified by human threats, not shrinking from the word of truth in the face of those who oppose it, ministering to the will of the only King; and besides this, reproving with frankness [parresia, bold candor], rebuking with compassion, making peace and reconciling those who are at variance, separating with good judgment the profane from the holy, the sound from the diseased, lest the one near at hand should communicate his own sickness; turning back the one who strays, strengthening the one who has grown weak, binding up the one who is broken. How great indeed is your work: the inspection of abbots, the judgment of cell-dwellers [monks living in private cells], the ordination of presbyters and deacons and the supervision of the life of all these, the protection of widows, the succor of orphans, the vindication of the oppressed, the championing of the wronged, and moreover the maintenance of right order. For since, when there is nothing that harms or hinders piety, it is fitting that we too be subject to every rule and authority and, if possible, be friendly toward all through generous and kindly welcome and forwardness in giving. For far be it from me to speak, concerning Your Blessedness, the things belonging to the opposite party of bad shepherds - such as those who shepherd the flock for shameful gain, those who reckon such a dignity as an occasion for an easy life and for the repose of the flesh and the enjoyment of desire, for the seizure of fleeting wealth and the acquisition of so many and so many acres of land, a herd of slaves and a multitude of livestock; and who for this reason, in a human and not a godly manner, leap upon the height of the presidency in order to raise the brow against their inferiors and to preside arrogantly over those held in greater honor. And I forbear to speak of those who fight, as much as the debt-collectors do, over property that is being lost, but do not resist on behalf of the doctrines of piety; or - what is far worse than these - of those who drag away and bruise the goods of their subordinates and from this gather up power and abundance. For those whom they ought rather to have stretched out a hand to in their poverty, these they do not refrain from squeezing out little by little - to whom shall they be likened? To Peter and John and their followers, perhaps - of whom it is said that they had no silver or gold, but the grace of the divine Spirit? Or to Simon the magician and Judas the betrayer and Gehazi the lover of money and the rest of the rich of this age? I speak of those men, I say, who look only to the present, to how things may go well for them, and who pamper the flesh, and add gold to their heart, and perhaps lend it at interest, or distribute it for increase to the needy and then hold it under their own wishes, and use it with partiality toward the unworthy or toward their kinsfolk - men who have acquired their whole concern, perhaps, for sowing much and reaping, and for planting so much and harvesting, and for adding to and multiplying their herds or flocks, like certain farmers who watch for the right moment and exploit shortages so as to sell and buy this and that, conducting themselves as it were in a businesslike and mercantile fashion, and not in an episcopal and priestly one - whose sole aim should be to give wings to a soul and snatch it from the world and give it to God, and to bring the whole flock safely out of the death of sin, and thus, only in a secondary sense, to provide the necessities of the present life through stewards and trustees. But woe is me, that I have recounted these things against myself, sketching out from my own passions things that do not exist in others! But you, O all-venerable father, being pure from such things, may you by your sacred prayers drive away the spiritual wolves from your Christ-sealed fold - this I know well - and may you lead and conduct these your flock into the regions of the virtues, nourishing and fattening them with the grass of your melodious teaching and the water of your pure faith, and may you on every occasion offer up acceptable sacrifices in your rational and purified services to God. But anticipating with your supplications, may you shepherd me too, the most long-suffering and many-sinning one, I beg and entreat. And forgive me, if I have provided you any laughter by my want of learning; except that it was not willingly, but compelled by your sacred and spiritual love, or rather your command, that I let myself down to this - having spoken not for any benefit of yours, but, as has been said, for the demonstration of my unfeigned obedience to you. Farewell in the Lord, praying above all for us who alone are sinners, O father most holy in all things.